Rethinking Holiday Traditions: What If We Embraced Change?

Consider the past year—maybe you moved, experienced a change in your family, job, or personal life. These shifts not only alter the dynamics of our families but also open doors for new patterns and possibilities. What if this year's holidays could unfold in a different way than the ones we remember? What if, in reflecting on the changes in our lives, we find the potential for new options for ourselves?

For many, holiday traditions have been on autopilot for years or even decades. Have you ever thought about making changes but felt hesitant to give yourself permission to do so? Well, here is your permission slip!

Take a few moments to mull it over:

• Decorations: Are you into it, or is it just not your thing? Maybe thinking of switching up the vibe?

• Food: Stick with the classics or ready for a culinary adventure?

• Religious traditions: A big deal or more of a laid-back vibe for you?

• Gatherings: Big party, small get-together, or just some solo time?

• Travel plans: Jetting off somewhere or keeping it close to home?

• Ever had the wild thought of skipping the holidays altogether for a vacay or a cozy day in?

I’m giving you the “green light” to make changes this year that best suit you for the holiday season and encourage you to opt out of everything else. And here’s why…when we do activities we don’t want to do out of a sense of obligation it fills us with feelings  of stress, dread, resentment, anxiety, overwhelm and we find ourselves either crying, overeating, over drinking, over shopping or all of the above.  It’s not a good place to be.

It’s because we are unable to say things like:

• No.

• Thank you for the invite.  I’m not available.

• I prefer to pull names rather than buy multiple gifts.

• When I come to visit, I’ll be staying in a hotel.

• I need help preparing dinner.

• I need help cleaning up after dinner.

• I don’t want to talk about hot-button issues.  Let’s change the subject.

• We’d like to get together the week before the holiday and have the actual holiday at home.

Consider adding some of these phrases into your boundary vocabulary because we all deserve a holiday that doesn’t feel like an obligation.